Sherrie's Blog

<p>A fellow adoptee friend told me that many adoptees and foster kids have a ! (exclamation mark) following their name. At first, I didn&#8217;t know what she meant, but as she elaborated the meaning, Anne of Green Gables came to mind. If you&#8217;ve watched this fascinating series, you would likely agree that Anne has a certain zest for life. Everything she says and does almost paints a picture with words. For those that have seen the movie, recall how Anne would burst into

<p>Who can even imagine how Retha felt? Perhaps, like a bucket of ice water was thrown on her? She probably shook in shock, like anyone when something unfathomable happened. Where was Mike? Was he holding her close? Knowing him for a lifetime, he was probably running for the back bedroom. And, there Retha was. All alone. No one to help her, no one who had the presence of mind to hold her close, even my grandmother.</p>

<p>Is it okay to ask the hospital where I was born for my medical records? Is it okay to ask for non-identifying information about my birth mother and birth father? Is it okay to say that I’m curious about them and might like to meet them some day? Is it okay to be angry about my birth mother&#8217;s decision to relinquish? Is it okay to search for my birth family? Is it okay to seek out other birth relatives if my birth mother rejects me at our reunion?<br /> These are a few

<p>Adopted children spend an exorbitant amount of psychic time in fantasy. They may seem to be sitting quietly in their rooms, or just looking out the window, when really they are deep in the Ghost Kingdom imagining scenarios that might have been or still might be…These fantasies are not just the passing fancies with which most people empower themselves at various periods of their lives but actual reality for the adoptee’s inner, secret self. They are the mother replacement:

<p>Randall is running to try to keep his sanity, but inside, he is screaming bloody murder. His friends, colleagues, and wife could see what was happening but he wouldn&#8217;t listen, wouldn&#8217;t connect. The longer the program went on, the more the pressures that came to bear on Randall and he began having insomnia and bad [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Randall was the first to notice memory problems in Rebecca and you could tell before the holidays that he was deeply concerned about her. That is so typical of many adoptees&#8211;because of the trauma we&#8217;ve been through, we have an extremely tender heart for those that are hurting.</p> <p>As the episode unfolded, not only did we see his tender heart but also the extremes he went to in order to gain entrance with a specialist. The doc said he texted her 48 times? And

<p>Adopted children feel different because they are different than you, biologically speaking. They are also different because of the way they became a part of your family. These are facts of life&#8211;facts you cannot change and facts you cannot fix. Your child is not the same as you, no matter how you slice it. But accepting, honoring, and appreciating her differences is a far cry from broadcasting them to the whole world. </p> <p>Modeling healthy boundaries will be a trea

<p>What comes to mind when you think about initiating a conversation with your child about his birth family? Do you feel defensive, like the birth family is the enemy to be avoided at all  costs? Do you feel sad, and does your lip begin to quiver at the thought of their possible presence in your child&#8217;s life? Do you fear your child will love them more than he loves you?</p> <p>If so, this section is especially for you.Kids are experts at reading body language. You can&#

<p>Why do birth relatives reject some of us? Does our physical appearance remind our birth mothers of our fathers, whom they have no positive feelings for? Does seeing us trigger issues in them that they have never dealt with? Are they emotionally and mentally unbalanced? Or are they just downright mean?</p> <p>What does it mean to be rejected and how does it feel? Webster’s gives us a good start on understanding its basic message. “Refusing to have, take, or act upon. To ref

<p>Hallmark reminds us of the upcoming Mothers Day with romanticized cards and sentimental gift offerings. Mothers Day is ideally a day for remembering the mothering we received and the incredible character of the mom who poured herself into us minute-by-minute, time after time, day after day, and year after year. It&#8217;s a time that&#8217;s often [&hellip;]</p>

<p>I have yet to meet an adoptee who can honestly claim to have never thought about his or her birth mother, especially on birthdays. In fact, a survey of more than 100 adoptees from the All-Adoptee Online group (all-adoptees@yahoogroups.com) confirm that many think of their birth mothers daily. It’s no wonder. Just think about how [&hellip;]</p>